You already do so much for the people in your life. Now you'll actually remember it.

Why I'm building this

I'm stuck in a loop. Work, do, help, listen, show up, keep promises, absorb the ones people break with me — and then when it's my turn to need something, I freeze. Not because I'm avoiding it. It's more like walking into a room with no pictures on the wall. No evidence I've ever done anything for anyone, or that anyone would show up for me. I know that's not literally true. I just have no way to see that it's not true.

There's one place in my life where this isn't a problem: my restaurant job. Every table gets a ticket — a cup of water or a full dinner, doesn't matter, if they're a customer, they get a ticket. And because of that, I can hold five tables in my head at once and know exactly where each one stands. I know table 3's just in a bad mood and I can let it slide. I know table 5's a regular who orders the same thing every time. I know who can cover for me and who I owe a favor to. It's more chaotic back there than anywhere else in my life, and somehow it's the one place I never lose the thread.

Everywhere else, my life is organized by project, not by person. I have a presentation, so I message person X. I need to research, so I avoid the café if person Z might be there. Somewhere in all of it, person A needed something and I forgot, because they were never the organizing unit — the project was. People become incidental to whatever I was doing when I happened to be with them. So when I try to figure out who's actually in my corner, I've got nothing to look at.

A CRM doesn't fix this. Personal CRMs are static — socials, address, notes — a journal that assumes you're naturally good at reading people. I'm not. It takes me a dozen times noticing the same pattern before I actually believe it. I take people at their word ("no, you didn't hurt me," "I don't need anything") over what actually happened, every time, because I don't have anything else to check it against. A real CRM is worse for this — it assumes a pipeline, phases, a deal to close. I'm not running a sales funnel on my old bandmate. There's nowhere to go.

So the pivot is small: every task you're already doing is for someone — you just have to label it. Not a new habit, not a new app category. The same task list you already need, with one more field. Do that consistently and it stops being a to-do list — it becomes a record of the actual shape of your life and who's in it.

You don't need another app

I already have a calendar, a to-do app, and every messaging app under the sun. The last thing I wanted to build was app #11 — one more place for things to get lost. So this isn't a new category of software you have to adopt. It's the task list you already need, with one thing added: who it's for.

If you don't want any of the relationship stuff, ignore it. Log tasks the same way you would in any fast, keyboard-driven, multi-device task manager — taskwarrior-style shortcuts included — and never touch an entity. Everything defaults to you if you don't say otherwise. It still works exactly like that.

But if you do label things — even loosely, even inconsistently — the app starts showing you something a to-do list or a static contacts app never could: the actual, accumulating shape of who you show up for, who shows up for you, and who's quietly drifted out of the picture. Not because you journaled about it. Because you were already doing the tasks. You just have to say who they were for.